Thursday, October 30, 2008
The rest of it bfore I went to bed.
Until now, he hasn't addressed the issue that I've been saying I like him. He hasn't said that he likes me to me. YET. He really needs to read this blog. SERIOUSLY.HA! LIKE THAT'S EVER GONNA HAPPEN.
Oh yes I remember he has changed the spelling of his name, something about it being a Hebrew spelling of a powerful word.
If your friends really are protective walls, you should be able to show them everything without them leaving. If they leave, then they are not protective walls as much as they are frail fences that get blown away in the wind, or climbed over by criminals.
As for me, I was wondering if you would ever contact me again. Until my birthday I thought I had damaged you too badly for normalisation of friendship. (He should have took it as a sign to keep in contact. DUH!) If this can be fixed, anything can be done, as I have had far lesser things happen that are not fixable.
I will see about watching those things you listed, are they on Crunchyroll?
Once again, I am sorry for being so blind and careless. !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!DUH
I look forward to hearing from you.
--J
--- On Wed, 29/10/08, Beverly Lin sihui
From: Beverly Lin sihui
Subject: Re: i'm not done... yet.
To: jamesuddin@yahoo.co.uk
Date: Wednesday, 29 October, 2008, 6:33 PM
From: James Uddin
To: Beverly Lin sihui
Sent: Thursday, 30 October 2008 2:09:21
Subject: Re: i'm not done... yet.
Oh yes I remember he has changed the spelling of his name, something about it being a Hebrew spelling of a powerful word.
If your friends really are protective walls, you should be able to show them everything without them leaving. If they leave, then they are not protective walls as much as they are frail fences that get blown away in the wind, or climbed over by criminals.
As for me, I was wondering if you would ever contact me again. Until my birthday I thought I had damaged you too badly for normalisation of friendship. (He should have took it as a sign to keep in contact. DUH!) If this can be fixed, anything can be done, as I have had far lesser things happen that are not fixable.
I will see about watching those things you listed, are they on Crunchyroll?
Once again, I am sorry for being so blind and careless. !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!DUH
I look forward to hearing from you.
--J
--- On Wed, 29/10/08, Beverly Lin sihui
From: Beverly Lin sihui
Subject: Re: i'm not done... yet.
To: jamesuddin@yahoo.co.uk
Date: Wednesday, 29 October, 2008, 6:33 PM
Thank you..I'm glad to hear that you're sorry. I'm sorry for what I've done as well, for hurting you. Kaleb(it's K now not C, he decided to change it). My friends have been my protective walls and I tell them everything except that I have a facade or maybe one or two of them knows. Maybe because I'm afraid that if I show it, they'll leave? Ok crap. I'm blogging all of this so they'll know now anyhow. If you want to know Kaleb told me you seemed like you were replying me for the sake of replying and that you were very "wu(2)liao(2)". He was saying also why were you talking about heritage and that he really feels like laughing after he read your reply.
I don't know why I do all that "garden/ house keeping" and maybe because I thought I could hide the ugly me since people tend to think I'm crude and don't act like a girl and be a girl for once. Who knew that I'll end up liking you (which I did not expect myself to) and causing all of this to happen because of my hiding. And I know of your incapability to sense things, I'm sorry for being so insensitive because I've never really had a friend who isn't able to sense/feel emotions normally. And maybe because I'm am loud person so ... I tend to lean towards overexpressive emotions. Which mean that when I told you I was crazy, it probably will translate to me being SUPER CRAZY and SUPERLY LOUD and SUPERLY VULGAR?????? Just watch ,"My Sassy Girl" and "My Tutor's Friend" and you'll know what I might be like in real life.
-Beverly
I don't know why I do all that "garden/ house keeping" and maybe because I thought I could hide the ugly me since people tend to think I'm crude and don't act like a girl and be a girl for once. Who knew that I'll end up liking you (which I did not expect myself to) and causing all of this to happen because of my hiding. And I know of your incapability to sense things, I'm sorry for being so insensitive because I've never really had a friend who isn't able to sense/feel emotions normally. And maybe because I'm am loud person so ... I tend to lean towards overexpressive emotions. Which mean that when I told you I was crazy, it probably will translate to me being SUPER CRAZY and SUPERLY LOUD and SUPERLY VULGAR?????? Just watch ,"My Sassy Girl" and "My Tutor's Friend" and you'll know what I might be like in real life.
-Beverly
From: James Uddin
To: Beverly Lin sihui
Sent: Thursday, 30 October 2008 2:09:21
Subject: Re: i'm not done... yet.
| Well, I do mean I am sorry, and I was responsible for everything here. I have never been in any situation like this before, so I might say exactly the opposite of what I actually want. What I want is for the wounds to heal. I am very sorry that I did this, and I will try not to do this again. I thought your friends were your protective walls. When I talked to Caleb, he gave me the impression that he was looking out for you every step of the way, and I thought all your friends were like that. I wish I had lots of friends looking out for me. Unfortunately I could not read what was said between you and him, as my computer can no longer support Chinese characters, and I cannot seem to be able to re-install it, and between you and me, this copy for windows is illegal, apparrently, so I am unable to download the software. I am aware that you have been brushing all the crumbs under the carpet and weeding the garden so that I see only the good side of you, but I am incabable (It's incapable) of actually doing that, so you have been seeing the real me, and I am seeing a watered down version of you, so this might explain a fraction of the trouble. |
what did i do so wrong that you had to leave me alone ... at 11:02 AM
0 people in the crowd heard my words
0 people in the crowd heard my words
